Sometimes, you just have to do it….

For the perfect Popeye’s Fried Chicken meal, do the following:

1) Get in your car

2) Drive to the nearest Popeye’s Fried Chicken restaurant

3) Go to the Drive-Thru OR

4) Go inside

3a) When the screeching noise stops emanating from the speaker, shout out your order

4a) When the screeching noise stops emanating from the Being behind the counter, shout out your order

5) Disregard what gibberish you hear in return

6) Repeat your order

7) Repeat Step 5

8) Repeat Step 6

9) When you are satisfied that the Screeching Being has your order, or if you simply have given up, drive or step to the next window

10) Pay and cheerfully accept whatever package the Being gives you. If you give the Being on the other side of the window grief, lord knows what “special sauce” the Being will “add” to your order. Better not!

11) Drive to the comfort of your home, allowing the intoxicating aroma of the fried food to permeate your senses

12) Unpack and replate your fried chicken and side dishes

13) Eat with reckless abandon

14) Repeat as necessary