So I’ve been using the crock pot more lately. It’s been so hot here in Houston that any alternative to firing up the oven and/or stove is welcome. I made a Chinese oxtail soup the other day (that’s another post) in the crock pot, which came out wonderful. Now I had a pack of turkey legs in the fridge that needed to be cooked. Perfect for the crock!

So yesterday, before we left for lunch out with friends, I whipped up a nice rub for the turkey legs: olive oil, salt, black pepper, white pepper, cayenne pepper, garlic and onion powders, tarragon, oregano, thyme and dry mustard (based on the wonderful Sticky Chicken recipe on CDKitchen), seasoned the meaty legs, stuffed them in the crock and turned them on HI while I went to get dressed.

On the way out the door, while the burglar alarm was beeping, I zipped by the crock pot and turned it down to low. Perfect, I thought. About six hours later, I’d have some delicious turkey to eat with some rice, green peas, maybe a little gravy made with those oh-so-delicious concentrated juices in the bottom of the crock!!

All through lunch (a tasty affair at our favorite Tex-Mex restaurant) I thought about the turkey legs, moist and juicy, steaming in the crock! I thought about the herbs and spices I’d used; was there enough oregano? Did I used too much pepper? Will I be able to detect the lovely, fragrant tarragon?? Maybe steamed broccoli will go better with the zesty seasoning?? Even as I ate chips and salsa and delicious grilled pork chops, I was really lusting after that turkey!

We got home around 5 pm. As I walked into the kitchen, I thought, how can I control myself? Even as stuffed as I was from lunch, I’d want to eat these legs right away! Steer clear, I said, don’t ruin the turkey!

Only another hour to go….

Finally, the time came. The crock pot called to me, the yummy goodness inside just beckoning me to open the clouded lid, to catch the intoxicating aroma in my nose, to savor all that goodness that had been building up for SO LONG!! I began assembling my side dishes. China and flatware were drawn. Chops were licked.

I carefully walked up to the crock pot, and gripped the sides to pull it forward, thinking “the easier to EAT you with, my dear! HAHAHAHAHAHA!” Oh lord. I’d become delirious with desire.

The sides were ice cold.

I pulled the crock towards me. The lifeless cord skittered across the countertop, the bare prongs of the plug staring up at me, as if to say “you idiot!”

Something inside me died.

I tore off the lid, knowing full well what was inside: Pasty, raw turkey meat. Images of my delicious turkey meal evaporated from my mind in an instant.

HOWEVER….

Not to be deterred, I immediately started calculating…hmm…an hour on HI, four hours on LOW…..heck, what’s wrong with a midnight dinner?????

The moral of this story?

APPLIANCES ARE ONLY AS GOOD AS THE OPERATOR!!